How far is too far physical boundaries in dating
When we broke up after just dating for six weeks I recognized it was God’s grace that things didn’t work out for us, because if our relationship had kept together much longer I would have lost my will power to hold back and would have crossed my boundaries…and I knew once one line was crossed that I wouldn’t be able to stop.After that relationship the chorus of Song of Songs really spoke to me: “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires” (2:7, 3:5, 8:4).I realized that more than just saying, “I’m not going to have sex until I get married,” that I also needed to protect my mind and my body from being “aroused and awakened” to that aspect of love too soon.And from that first relationship I had learned about my own boundaries and what situations I should avoid to keep true to God’s command.After the struggles from the first relationship, I resolved to be steadfast and pure with my second relationship.I was still a teenager and I knew I wouldn’t be able to marry anytime soon, so I knew it would only cause stress and unhealthy temptation if our boundaries were too loose.So for the second relationship I set up the boundary that we would only kiss standing up (like a kiss good night).
When I first dated in high school I didn’t really have any clear boundaries aside from wanting to wait until marriage for sex and also sensing that there shouldn’t be inappropriate touching.
If you’re kissing before you’re in a committed relationship then you are demonstrating that you are both easy and that commitment doesn’t matter that much to you.
Show respect to yourself and at least reserve such physical affection for a committed relationship.
After my first breakup the sudden lack of physical touch was hard for me to cope with and there was a desire to seek that fulfillment in wrong places.
But after the second breakup, there was no sudden drop off of physical intimacy, so I was much healthier in that aspect. I learned that during the second relationship and I’ve seen it in many other relationships too. And for each couple there can be different situations that may cause more temptation than others.
Sure, we definitely got tempted at different times (that is normal), but by keeping prayerful, communicating with our girlfriends honestly, and also being honest with each other with how we were doing, all of us overcame the temptations. If you’re still in college and have no money in the bank, you’re probably not getting married anytime soon.